What is this thing that men call death,
This quiet passing in the night?
’Tis not the end, but genesis
Of better worlds and greater light.
O God, touch Thou my aching heart,
And calm my troubled, haunting fears.
Let hope and faith, transcendent, pure,
Give strength and peace beyond my tears.
One of the dearest people in my life, my partner in both roadside cleanups and in classical sing offs, the one who taught me pretty much all I know about jazz and introduced me to the "greats," the one who has spent at least a gazillion hours on crazy road trips with me, choir trips, hikes, midnight Denny's study parties, and numerous other adventures, one who has largely influenced who I am today...well, she, Megan O'Hanlon of Irish descent, got married, October 25th, 2008, at a lovely Unitarian Church in Mt. Vernon, right outside of Washington, D.C.It has been difficult for me to put down in words my thoughts; its hard to know where to begin when talking about something so important happening to someone you love so much. At one point, Megs asked me how I felt, and honestly, I just felt so happy for her and to be with her. There is no where else I would have been. The entire experience was a ton of fun, full of memories, and a very action packed blurr in my mind :). That week leading up to the wedding was full of activities and little details to help everyone feel special and feel apart of this most important day for Megs. I was so impressed with the great attention Megs gave to even the smallest of details. Not only was her wedding a wonderful and a very special occasion, but also an event that gave to all who participated; it was like a sincere thank you to all those Megs loves. 
During the week, Megs and Alejandro threw a sweet bachelor and bachelorette party at an 80's club where we danced the evening away, all decked out in 80's garb. As bridesmaids, we spent part of the week with Megs in an antique-like, history-filled hotel in D.C., and then she took as many guests as wanted to go, on a dinner cruise out on the Patomic River the night before she was married. It was such a blessing to see so many people we have loved through the years, to hear how they're doing and to catch up on their lives. We all had such a great time - its just too hard to describe all the feelings I experienced.
During her ceremony, Megs used an Irish folk group to play the processional and recessional music. They were fabulous! This group also accompanied Joe and I as we sang "Be Thou My Vision," one of Meg's favorite hymns. As we sang that piece, I felt something unique and really special. The ceremony was performed by a wonderful man dear to both Megan and Alejandro, who did a lovely job. Everything with the wedding party also seemed to go smoothly which was a great relief since it had been rather funny and crazy trying to pull everyone together before hand! The night ended in a amazing dinner and dancing. Ben, Emily, and their kids came as well as James and Joe. It was too much fun partying it up with these folks. This last picture was near the end of the night. I just love my brothers - it was so nice to be with them! Thank you Megan for everything and for blessing my life and making me a part of this memory. I love you.
Since my first year in Provo, I have visited Zion National Park on numerous occasions to camp and hike through the Narrows, the Emerald Pools, to Weeping Rock, etc. My mom is from the desert. As a little girl, mom's favorite hike was up Angel's Landing, which she and her two siblings would do practically running, as little kids do :). For some reason, it was not until last year that I actually hiked Angel's Landing for the first time. It was a really special and sacred experience for me as every step made me think of my angel mother. She is the reason for soooo much good in my life and one of the most important reasons I have the beliefs I have. As I reached the top that first time, I felt a very real connection to her that I hope to never forget. 
The day after the hike, we visited my feisty and hilarious grandmother McCain in Cedar City at this great rehabilitation center where she is relearning how to walk(!) because of complications. She was too good to us and I was so grateful to see her. It has come to me that she has blessed my life more than I will ever really understand. Thank you Grandma. Enjoy the pictures all :). Cheers! 
Well, its Halloween! Even in Boston, kids of all ages dress up and pretend to be something or someone else, and then ask you to give them candy for their efforts. Love that. This year, Den is Dracula...and a very scary one, if I do say so myself. Annie is a bumble bee...even though she was going to be ghost for pretty much this entire week and only changed her mind at the last minute. Got to love that too. Em dressed up as a scary witch and I respect that :) And of course, Ben was himself as he carried little Brigham around.
I couldn't help wishing that fall would never pass onto winter. It's amazing to me that leaves never seem to bore me. Every step on a pile of leaves, comes with so much pleasure as I hear the crunching sound of the red, yellow, orange, and brown little ones beneath my feet. And though I know I should feel bad, even as an adult I just love to run through a pile of leaves and scatter them everywhere. Leaves aren't meant to be in a pile...they are meant cover the earth!
Don't feel sorry for me because I've been sick. I certainly don't feel sorry for myself. The experience has forced me to be still and to ponder several things that I haven't allowed myself the time to think about lately. Somewhere between 2 and 6am this morning, as I alternated between blowing my nose, drinking water, climbing the stairs to the washroom from the basement, and then hitting the bed again, laying on my back and looking up at the ceiling, ...I had a pretty neat experience. Well first, I thought something very funny. My independent self thought, "I just want someone to take care of me and go get me some hot lentil soup and make my headache go away!" And yes, I did feel kind of woozy crazy, but after my headache left, I felt a wonderful peace...one that invited me to review my life for the last bit.
Liz and I had a wonderful time going to church this morning. The sky and the mountains really shone and their beauty made us smile. At church, we listened to a wonderful musical program by the U's Institute Singers. It seems that music speaks most directly to me and a few of their numbers did just that. Later, we were asked to introduce ourselves by naming our favorite flower. We found out that lots of lovely folks favor orchids and lilies. Who knew?!
Anyone reading this will most likely already know about their passing, but I'm keeping this blog just as much for myself as for anyone else who would like to read it. Although my dear friend Allison Walther and her dad, Craig, died in the car crash reported in the news July 19th of this year, it has taken me a while to be able to write about it formally. My journal contains my thoughts, but I wanted to post a tribute to both Craig and Allison - two wonderful people who have both played major roles in my life.
Craig is Ali's dad. In many ways, he represents what a good father and husband should be like. Since I first met the Walther family, I remember Craig referring to his wife, Kathy, in church or in conversation, as his better half, as the reason he was who he was at that point. Throughout the years, he continued to praise Kathy and as I listened to him, I made a silent promise to myself that I wanted to find someone who respected women and would view me in that way too. The Walther house is visible from the windows in the Castleton house :). On many afternoons, I would look out and see Craig and Ali practicing volleyball hits and serves on their lawn. Ali told me once that she knew she could talk to her dad about anything and that she felt he always loved her. Once again, I hoped I would find someone who would be that way for my girls someday.
I still remember coming to my family ward for church one Sunday while I was studying at Pacific Lutheran University. As I ran into Craig and stuck out my hand to give him a shake, he said something like, "Ah, Becky, you don't have to keep giving me handshakes - you're like my daughter. You have to give me hugs from now on!" And, I always did. Everytime I came home, I looked forward to running into Craig, giving him a hug and catching up on life for a moment. It was always very obvious to me how much he cared about me and about all of us "kids"...friends of his kids.
As I have thought about honoring Ali and Craig, I have decided to try and reach out a little more, be a better friend, smile a little more, and laugh a little truer. Ali and Craig did that for me; they lifted me and their memory continues to lift me still. I miss them both, but because they loved me and because I love them, I will be a better person to the rest of my siblings on this earth. Thank you to both of you.
http://craigandallison.blogspot.com/
